Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
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We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
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My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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