I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
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