if you like me you must not know who I am
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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