PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
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