why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
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I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
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The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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