I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize