Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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