you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
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I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
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I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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