OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize