can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
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