Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize