what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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