32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize