I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
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