We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize