I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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