i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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