I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Randomize