It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
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dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
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Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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