I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
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