remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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