I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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