everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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