My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
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It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
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one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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