I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize