if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
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