you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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