you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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