I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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