My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize