WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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