I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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