he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I checked into jail on foursquare
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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