i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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