Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
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