Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
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These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
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I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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