and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize