We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
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Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
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Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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