It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize