I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
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Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
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Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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