go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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