I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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