Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize