Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize