I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
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Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize