"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize