but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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