I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
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Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
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I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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