So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
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The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
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Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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