watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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